A Nation of Bullies

Oct 01, 2010 @ 9:34 am | By TheFeministGriote | 6 Comments

Do you think that it’s your civil duty to out another human being? Well that is exactly what Dharun Ravi did to his roommate 18 year Rutgers University freshman Tyler Clementi. Dharun Ravi placed a video camera in the dorm room that he shared with Tyler Clementi and live streamed Tyler Clementi making out with another young man. Tyler Clementi was riddled with so much shame and shock that according to ABC news on  September 22, 2010 at 8:42 pm Tyler Clementi posted this message on his facebook page, “jumping off gw(George Washington) bridge sorry”.  Dhuran Ravi and his accomplice Molly Wei have been charged with invasion of privacy according to New Jersey police documents.

Now I am sure that Dharun Ravi thought it was a joke to take to his twitter page and put his roommates sexuality on the world wide web, I am sure that he thought it was extremely funny to send out a live feed of his roommate making out with another man, but what I am almost certain of is that Dharun Rhavi probably never thought in a million years that his roommate Tyler would kill himself over this ordeal. I bet Dharun Ravi doesn’t know that LGBT teens are 30-40% more likely to commit suicide according to diversityinc.com.  I know that as a population we are becoming increasingly open and willing to share every parts of our lives. We tweet incessantly and alert the world of every change in our mood, lives, and jobs. We post intimate pictures of our friends and family on facebook and we watch hours upon hours of invasive reality tv to feed our insatiable appetite to know.

Bullying among children has become so rampant, case in point in October of 2009 Michael Brewer a 15 year old from Fort Lauderdale, Fl was set on fire by two other teens. 65% of Michael Brewer’s body was burned.  Bullying is an issue, kids are bullied at school, adults are bullied by other adults as work,  but most importantly cyber bullying is a HUGE problem. People create fake pages on twitter and facebook and not to mention these larger than life online personalities and they think its their right to say whatever they want about another person not caring if it may be untrue, damaging, or just plain old embarrassing personal information. The more technologically savvy we become the more of our humanity we lose. Children are learning to hate and prey one another from their parents, older siblings, and society as a whole. Yes, I said parents because name calling and belittling was not tolerated in my house when I was growing up. My parents did not make fun of people for sport in our presence when my brothers and I were growing up. We were taught to have compassion for our fellow man and that is how I live my life now. I do understand that children can be persuaded by peer pressure, but I really do believe that children learn to mimic and metabolize their parents hatred, prejudices, and isms.

I remember being on my HBCU campus and over hearing and engaging in  many conversations about people’s sexuality. “Outing” people at my school was practically every ones minor. A fake facebook page made its debut on the campus which only existed to “out” men and women and to spread vicious gossip and lies about our fellow classmates. The campus thrived on that negativity like it was manna from heaven. That fake page had so many friends that ranged from students to staff. And of course let us not forget how now we think its cool and okay to twitpic people so they can be the perpetual butt of our jokes. When did this become okay. I remember one night someone took a picture of  a young man isn’t very open about his homosexuality at a gay club and broad casted it on twitter. At the time I both laughed and cringed because I was in shock. Every time we go somewhere and see someone dressed tacky, with a horrible hairdo, or just doing something that we deem comical we pull out our camera phones and send the pictures to twitter, facebook, and MTO.com as if there is nothing wrong.

I know that some people may think that how can you equate what Dharun Ravi did to Tyler Clementi to people who twitpic “funny” pictures and to that I say  because both situations show how our blatant disregard for people and privacy has gone to far. Just like Dharun Ravi did not ask Tyler Clementi’s permission to video tape him while  he was making out with another man is the same way that you don’t ask the person of whom you are going to twitpic permission to publicly embarrass them. We need to stop being a nation of bullies and start respecting others rights to privacy and we need to  unlearn bullying as adults so that we do not pass it on to our kids. People are dying over salacious gossip, bullying, and being pushed out the closet. When will it not be funny to alienate another human being?

Do you think its okay to twitpic people without there consent for your satisfaction and what do you think should be done about  bullying among our kids?

Categories: Mind Over Chatter

6 Responses to “ A Nation of Bullies ”

  1. You are so very right, bullying needs to stop! I am beyond disturbed at the epidemic of young people committing suicide over being bullied. I strongly believe there needs to be serious and harsh consequences for bullies so people learn that it’s NOT ok to harass and/or torment someone for whatever reason.

    Also, there needs to be more people who are not afraid to stand up to this horrendous, despicable behavior and fight for some sort of legislation against cyberbullying and zero tolerance policies in the schools – including college campuses.

    Its hilarious that people hide behind anonymous posts on message boards or fake twitter & facebook accounts to torment people. If you’re really so big and bad do that ish out in the open! Don’t hide behind your computer screen.

  2. @NYM as a society we definitely need to get on the same page about bullying and collectively work together to stamp it out. I think with the rash of cyber bullying and bullying as whole tougher laws are coming. Making a public spectacle of someones life for your sick twisted enjoyment is never ok!

  3. ughhh!!!! I can’t stand bullying… I’ll never understand it. People (young and old) can be so flippin cruel. Its not hard…. all you have to do is think before you act… if more live people lived by the ‘Do unto others as you would have them do unto to’ rule life would simply be easier… you want all and I mean ALL your business out there?! no. You wanna get beat the hell up or better yet, do YOU want to be lit on fire? doubt it…

    Also, I agree that parents need to teach their children better, it breaks my heart when I see any young kid suffering in any way at all… and I understand that it affects them for life. Sociopaths, Dissociative Identity Disorder etc…. people are literally creating ‘new’ people inside of them to protect their mindframe?? its terrible…. I hate when a person says ‘I don’t know why I do the things I do, I just can’t help it… but PLEASE don’t send me to jail- do you know what they do to people like me?’ ugh…

    Nevertheless, when are we (as adults) going to take some form of responsibility?? There is painful stuff my dad did to me(when I was little)- that I know I will so shield and never do to my future children… stop the generational curses!

  4. Unfortunately, we have trained our children to do this and to desire to see it done. I blame the media–our biggest teacher–of showing us how with shows like Cheaters, Jerry Springer, and those Wildest police shows that I believe have raised our tolerance to looking at suffering. Then the reality shows that raise our tolerance for privacy invasion like the Kardashians and those shows on VH1 that make fun of everybody for any reason.
    All of this FUN has deadened us. And we wonder why our children are so cruel!!
    I remember when folks were protesting these kinds of shows and were called all kinds of names and ridiculed. Now look at things on TV! There’s nothing good anymore, and our kids are watching this mess!

  5. @ Candiann “people are literally creating ‘new’ people inside of them to protect their mind frame” those words have been haunting me since I read your comment. That is exactly what these kids are doing & in the end some of them crack!

  6. @Anna Renee you are absolutely right these shows have definitely desensitized our children and they now thrive on seeing people humiliated.

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